Ex-wife went down for an interview about 3 hours south of here. If she gets it, I won't be seeing the kids through the week like I do, which is depressing me a bit (and if she doesn't get this one, she'll keep trying. The new job puts her significantly closer to her boyfriend's home. gag!) The kids don't know the details of the where of her interview. I really don't want to leave this job, but I don't want to miss out on my kids' lives, either. Damn.
Elsewise, I now have a small glass bottle with a bit of sulfur in it sitting on my desk. It's a combination of an object lesson from our dean and a bit of perversity on my part. Incidentally, does anyone know if inhaling sulfur is bad for you?
I've been reading, but I can't remember what at the moment (sulfur? nah, just stress.)
I hope y'all are doing well out there in the RealWorld!
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Friday, January 26, 2007
expectations
forty plus hours of meetings and desk work,
and I'm expected to know all the latest in
theology,
philosophy,
technology,
cataloging,
current events,
current literature,
and
anything else
anyone might want me to know
no time for hands-on with the technology, but I'm expected to
troubleshoot,
configure,
recommend,
step-in,
and explain why things are the way they are--
don't spend time with it,
but be responsible for it;
let IT handle it,
except when they can't act as quickly
(or as psychically)
as we'd like;
remind me
(without words)
that I'm a failure for not being able to fly with it
my house is a mess
(and my apartment's none too tidy, either)
my health report has my real age about six years
older
than my birth certificate
six years
closer to dying, closer to crying
my house is haunted
but the ghosts are all gone;
the spirits,
the faeries,
the gremlins,
the dryads,
the elves
...all gone
what do you call a haunted house
that's no longer haunted?
where again is that living water
where is that bread
that wine
that view of the world where
everything
just fits?
and I'm expected to know all the latest in
theology,
philosophy,
technology,
cataloging,
current events,
current literature,
and
anything else
anyone might want me to know
no time for hands-on with the technology, but I'm expected to
troubleshoot,
configure,
recommend,
step-in,
and explain why things are the way they are--
don't spend time with it,
but be responsible for it;
let IT handle it,
except when they can't act as quickly
(or as psychically)
as we'd like;
remind me
(without words)
that I'm a failure for not being able to fly with it
my house is a mess
(and my apartment's none too tidy, either)
my health report has my real age about six years
older
than my birth certificate
six years
closer to dying, closer to crying
my house is haunted
but the ghosts are all gone;
the spirits,
the faeries,
the gremlins,
the dryads,
the elves
...all gone
what do you call a haunted house
that's no longer haunted?
where again is that living water
where is that bread
that wine
that view of the world where
everything
just fits?
Monday, January 22, 2007
Hair Thair Be Dragons
On a whim I got my haircut over lunch today. The young lady asked "how short do you want it?" I thought for a second and said "Well, not buzzed. Something like an insurance agent or a Republican." So now my shadow no longer has cool hair that whips in the wind. Oh well (it grows back. right?!?)
Talking to the hair cutter, I discover she's a sci-fi/fantasy person working on a screenplay for a fantasy tale about dragons. Here, in Lincoln. Go figure.
OK, Winter, I think this post is MORE boring than yours was! ;-)
Talking to the hair cutter, I discover she's a sci-fi/fantasy person working on a screenplay for a fantasy tale about dragons. Here, in Lincoln. Go figure.
OK, Winter, I think this post is MORE boring than yours was! ;-)
Just Another Manic Monday
On the road to Bloomington this weekend I saw a red-tailed hawk perched on a speed limit sign on my side of the road. Hours later on the return trip I saw what appeared to be the same hawk again on my side of the road (roughly the same stretch of interstate). I guess I'm pre-scientific enough to take that as a good omen. At the very least it made me smile.
You Suck. No, not you personally. You Suck: A Love Story is the title of Chris Moore's latest novel, a sequel to Blood Sucking Fiends: A Love Story. No, I haven't read the new one yet, but Real Soon Now.
On the reading front, I'm waiting for my son to deliver book two of A Series of Unfortunate Events into my hand. I finished Moore's Coyote Blue (which just leaves Fluke and You Suck to read and I'll have read all of his novels!) I'm skimming a book on C# published by Microsoft Press (the first MS Press book I've ever read, I think), and I'm about two-thirds through the Blamires book.
I made another trip to the local used bookstore that's closing and picked up a few more items (yes, Dodo, a couple of them made it into your box!) One crazy thing I picked up was a book on assembly language for the Commodore 64. Good times, 8-bit computing. I'll probably never actually use the book, but the collector gene kicked in.
A friend tossed me the discs for the first two seasons of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Not a show I'd recommend to everyone, but it has its laugh outloud moments. Enough folks have talked to me about House that I'm feeling compelled to start renting the first season of it (and I suppose I should take the plunge and start watching Numb3rs).
Words are cool. We've talked in this blog circle about words before. I wonder why certain words appeal to certain people. For instance, I like the word "brimstone." I couldn't tell you why, and I doubt that it's a universally appealing word, but I like it.
Well, obviously I'm just rambling, so I'll let you get back to your lives. Thanks for stopping by!
You Suck. No, not you personally. You Suck: A Love Story is the title of Chris Moore's latest novel, a sequel to Blood Sucking Fiends: A Love Story. No, I haven't read the new one yet, but Real Soon Now.
On the reading front, I'm waiting for my son to deliver book two of A Series of Unfortunate Events into my hand. I finished Moore's Coyote Blue (which just leaves Fluke and You Suck to read and I'll have read all of his novels!) I'm skimming a book on C# published by Microsoft Press (the first MS Press book I've ever read, I think), and I'm about two-thirds through the Blamires book.
I made another trip to the local used bookstore that's closing and picked up a few more items (yes, Dodo, a couple of them made it into your box!) One crazy thing I picked up was a book on assembly language for the Commodore 64. Good times, 8-bit computing. I'll probably never actually use the book, but the collector gene kicked in.
A friend tossed me the discs for the first two seasons of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Not a show I'd recommend to everyone, but it has its laugh outloud moments. Enough folks have talked to me about House that I'm feeling compelled to start renting the first season of it (and I suppose I should take the plunge and start watching Numb3rs).
Words are cool. We've talked in this blog circle about words before. I wonder why certain words appeal to certain people. For instance, I like the word "brimstone." I couldn't tell you why, and I doubt that it's a universally appealing word, but I like it.
Well, obviously I'm just rambling, so I'll let you get back to your lives. Thanks for stopping by!
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Interesting Thought
I was reading while eating my biscuits and gravy this morning and came across a sentence that made me stop and think:
"Your beliefs, as a Christian, are not yours in the sense that you have rights over them, either to tamper with them or throw them away." --Harry Blamires, The Christian Mind
I don't get to define what being a Christian means ("well, this is what being a Christian means to me..." NOT!) Christianity (Christ) defines me, or else I'm just another heretic. Of course there is an element of subjectivity and interpretation, but there is also a reality outside of me (or, more to the point, a Reality). I wonder how much of who I am is me baptizing what I want to be rather than truly wrestling with what a real God wants me to be.
"Your beliefs, as a Christian, are not yours in the sense that you have rights over them, either to tamper with them or throw them away." --Harry Blamires, The Christian Mind
I don't get to define what being a Christian means ("well, this is what being a Christian means to me..." NOT!) Christianity (Christ) defines me, or else I'm just another heretic. Of course there is an element of subjectivity and interpretation, but there is also a reality outside of me (or, more to the point, a Reality). I wonder how much of who I am is me baptizing what I want to be rather than truly wrestling with what a real God wants me to be.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
The Fruit of My Aging
The older I get the more I come to believe that:
- I don't know hardly anything
- grace is the most valuable "thing" there is
- I am no better than the worst criminal
- no one will ever know how old the universe is
- loneliness sucks
- life is difficult, and there aren't always ways to "fix" the difficulties
- there is a real universe out there, even if we only know it through the interface of our individual thoughts, feelings, and sensations
- there's too much to read (even if no one ever wrote another word again)
- there's too much noise (in the world and in my soul)
- pencil and paper bring a type of happiness that I can't get with a computer
- much of what I believe may well be wrong
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Not with a Bang, But a Wimper
Well, maybe this isn't the end of this blog, but it sure has seemed slooooooooow (for the record, I hate repeating vowels to make some kind of emphasis. The word should be 'slow' ...I'm a moron). 2007, the year I tried to blog but everything came out stupid.
This may be partly attributable to the constant sharp pain stretching from my elbow to my knuckles on my right hand. I'm guessing an RSI of some sort. It hurts all the time, no matter what I do. Any suggestions? (Beside the obvious: go see my doctor).
This may be partly attributable to the constant sharp pain stretching from my elbow to my knuckles on my right hand. I'm guessing an RSI of some sort. It hurts all the time, no matter what I do. Any suggestions? (Beside the obvious: go see my doctor).
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
What, It's the New Year Already?!?
Those who are the self-appointed gatekeepers of the blogverse point out that "no one cares what you had for dinner" by which, of course, they mean that you shouldn't post about the crappy little mundanities that make up the bulk of your life. To which I say, "foo!" Not every post can be a deep commentary on some wayward aspect of our existence in this vast cosmos. And besides, I *like* hearing what's going on in my friends' lives. Yea, verily, even what they're eating these days :-) So, while I won't describe my own current culinary adventures, I *will* provide a brief recap of my Christmas break.
Working in academia has some advantages (great salary not being one of them), such as Christmas break. From December 22 through January 1 I was off work! The best part wad that during that entire time I had my kids (except for two nights and one day when they were at their mom's). That's really enough to say: it was a good break :-)
I finished reading The Looking Glass Wars, Frank Beddor's reworking of the Alice in Wonderland material. The writing is not literary quality, and I've read a couple of negative reviews, but, overall, I liked it. Give me a good Alice story any day. Admittedly, there were things I didn't like about it (like dissing on Lewis Carroll) and some things were corny (like the AD52, automatic dealer, shooting 52 razor sharp cards a second!) Hatter Madigan, the queen's bodyguard and "original" of the Mad Hatter, was my favorite character (and, I'm guessing, most everyone else's as well... thus the spin-off comic book series Hatter M, eh?) If you like fantasy, the book is worth a quick read, but maybe not worth you're $18 (unless you're kind of a freak collector of Lewis Carroll related stuff... not that I know anybody like that!)
Santa delivered the kids' goods to my place this year. Everyone was happy and got way too much Stuff. My six-year-old daughter and I played soccer one afternoon. Neither of us have a clue how to play, but we had great fun anyway. Her mom had gotten her a soccer ball for Christmas, and then sent it to my place to stay. Same for the chem set she got for my son. It's cool, though: I colored my hands blue with a splash of a "minor skin irritant." I miss the glass test tubes and alcohol lamps of my childhood chemistry set. These new things are too safe for mad science. For the record, my daughter beat me 10-4 and is anxiously awaiting a rematch to trounce me again.
My son finished the Lemony Snickett books and is insistent I read them, so... it looks like I know my next fiction reads. I've also picked up Rucker's latest collection which I'm eager to get started.
Moviewise, I've re-watched movies the kids wanted to see: The Tenth Kingdom and The Little Vampire among the better titles. We also watched Superman Returns (I know, it was about time!) and last night I watched a Jason Lee movie I'd never heard of called Drop Dead Sexy, which was weird and funny and twisted and borderline necrophiliac (all of which could be said of The Corpse Bride, even though the movies have nothing in common). I've had a few people tell me to get to a theater and see The Nativity. Anyone out there seen it?
Well, it's good to be back online. Here's to 2007, may you find more wonder and delight and joy than you ever dreamed possible!
Working in academia has some advantages (great salary not being one of them), such as Christmas break. From December 22 through January 1 I was off work! The best part wad that during that entire time I had my kids (except for two nights and one day when they were at their mom's). That's really enough to say: it was a good break :-)
I finished reading The Looking Glass Wars, Frank Beddor's reworking of the Alice in Wonderland material. The writing is not literary quality, and I've read a couple of negative reviews, but, overall, I liked it. Give me a good Alice story any day. Admittedly, there were things I didn't like about it (like dissing on Lewis Carroll) and some things were corny (like the AD52, automatic dealer, shooting 52 razor sharp cards a second!) Hatter Madigan, the queen's bodyguard and "original" of the Mad Hatter, was my favorite character (and, I'm guessing, most everyone else's as well... thus the spin-off comic book series Hatter M, eh?) If you like fantasy, the book is worth a quick read, but maybe not worth you're $18 (unless you're kind of a freak collector of Lewis Carroll related stuff... not that I know anybody like that!)
Santa delivered the kids' goods to my place this year. Everyone was happy and got way too much Stuff. My six-year-old daughter and I played soccer one afternoon. Neither of us have a clue how to play, but we had great fun anyway. Her mom had gotten her a soccer ball for Christmas, and then sent it to my place to stay. Same for the chem set she got for my son. It's cool, though: I colored my hands blue with a splash of a "minor skin irritant." I miss the glass test tubes and alcohol lamps of my childhood chemistry set. These new things are too safe for mad science. For the record, my daughter beat me 10-4 and is anxiously awaiting a rematch to trounce me again.
My son finished the Lemony Snickett books and is insistent I read them, so... it looks like I know my next fiction reads. I've also picked up Rucker's latest collection which I'm eager to get started.
Moviewise, I've re-watched movies the kids wanted to see: The Tenth Kingdom and The Little Vampire among the better titles. We also watched Superman Returns (I know, it was about time!) and last night I watched a Jason Lee movie I'd never heard of called Drop Dead Sexy, which was weird and funny and twisted and borderline necrophiliac (all of which could be said of The Corpse Bride, even though the movies have nothing in common). I've had a few people tell me to get to a theater and see The Nativity. Anyone out there seen it?
Well, it's good to be back online. Here's to 2007, may you find more wonder and delight and joy than you ever dreamed possible!
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Eighth Day Report
Thank GOD!!! the semester is over. The grading is done, the grades are turned in, and the slacker may be feeling a hint of burn-out :-)
Good things... my video game junkie son has put the DS down long enough to begin reading the Series of Unfortunate Events books. He's up to book eleven, which means we need to quickly lay hands on books 12 and 13. He likes puns and wordplay and is laughing out loud while he reads. It does an aged bookworm's heart good to see the old ways still being practiced by the young. (My kindergarten-age daughter reads a little, but mostly she demands stories be read to her. And since she likes fairy tales, I'm happy to oblige!)
Geek news: Bill Gates recently said DRM is too complicated. Just buy the CD and rip it. Bravo, Bill! I'd love to hear more like this from Mr. Gates in the coming months. Also, Linus Torvalds spoke out against making the Linux kernel not support binary-only drivers. He called such a move stupid and pointed out that it was motivated more by political than by technical considerations. You go, Linus!
Speaking of technical considerations, has anyone played with a Wii yet? My son thinks the motion sensitive controller sounds like an awesome idea. I'm a bit more skeptical. Without force feedback it seems more like an exercise in tai chi (not the worst thing that could happen to videogame junkies).
Well, Christmas is rapidly approaching. The season of gift-buying and giving, of wrapping paper and ribbons and cards and other paper products that will end up in the trash (or, in the case of many cards, in storage for a year). Of greed and gluttony and envy and more than a bit of pride and sloth. A season, in short, in need of redemption. Oh, for a savior to come into the world and deliver us from our worst selves into our better selves!
Good things... my video game junkie son has put the DS down long enough to begin reading the Series of Unfortunate Events books. He's up to book eleven, which means we need to quickly lay hands on books 12 and 13. He likes puns and wordplay and is laughing out loud while he reads. It does an aged bookworm's heart good to see the old ways still being practiced by the young. (My kindergarten-age daughter reads a little, but mostly she demands stories be read to her. And since she likes fairy tales, I'm happy to oblige!)
Geek news: Bill Gates recently said DRM is too complicated. Just buy the CD and rip it. Bravo, Bill! I'd love to hear more like this from Mr. Gates in the coming months. Also, Linus Torvalds spoke out against making the Linux kernel not support binary-only drivers. He called such a move stupid and pointed out that it was motivated more by political than by technical considerations. You go, Linus!
Speaking of technical considerations, has anyone played with a Wii yet? My son thinks the motion sensitive controller sounds like an awesome idea. I'm a bit more skeptical. Without force feedback it seems more like an exercise in tai chi (not the worst thing that could happen to videogame junkies).
Well, Christmas is rapidly approaching. The season of gift-buying and giving, of wrapping paper and ribbons and cards and other paper products that will end up in the trash (or, in the case of many cards, in storage for a year). Of greed and gluttony and envy and more than a bit of pride and sloth. A season, in short, in need of redemption. Oh, for a savior to come into the world and deliver us from our worst selves into our better selves!
Monday, December 11, 2006
Quickly Through the Sticky Wicket
* Walking down the sidewalk to my office this evening I heard music blaring from The Hole: Quiet Riot's "Bang Your Head." It's nice to know the children are still listening to classical music.
* Finally saw V for Vendetta. I liked it, even if Alan Moore didn't (and I read the stuff on the Internet, and I understand why Mr. Moore didn't like it, and I agree with his points, but I still managed to enjoy it!)
* My ex-wife gave me all of our Harry Potter books and videos this weekend. My liberal influence is wearing off, apparently... (but she assured me she wasn't passing any judgment on me if I choose to keep the stuff!)
* I've been trying to convince the science professor here that we all evolved from a common ancestor via natural selection. He's not buying it, but it's great fun!
* Life is weird. Just when you think that, maybe, you know, just maybe you're close to something called Normal, a change of perception and BAM! you're sitting on the edge again, spitting into the Abyss and waiting for something other than the echo of your own bloody heartbeat...
* Finally saw V for Vendetta. I liked it, even if Alan Moore didn't (and I read the stuff on the Internet, and I understand why Mr. Moore didn't like it, and I agree with his points, but I still managed to enjoy it!)
* My ex-wife gave me all of our Harry Potter books and videos this weekend. My liberal influence is wearing off, apparently... (but she assured me she wasn't passing any judgment on me if I choose to keep the stuff!)
* I've been trying to convince the science professor here that we all evolved from a common ancestor via natural selection. He's not buying it, but it's great fun!
* Life is weird. Just when you think that, maybe, you know, just maybe you're close to something called Normal, a change of perception and BAM! you're sitting on the edge again, spitting into the Abyss and waiting for something other than the echo of your own bloody heartbeat...
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Gum-on-My-Shoe During a Dark and Stormy Night
The Laffing Dragon was more or less empty. A couple of regulars bickering about politics and sports. One of Larry's girls working a couple of school boys who had wandered into the armpit of town. A local artist sitting at a corner table with his face in a plate of Al-Kazak's teriyaki potatoes (whether he was passed out again or just practicing his "performance art" was beyond my ken.) I was thirsty, like a dying lizard on the not-so-dark side of the moon, and so I made my way to where that rat-faced ex-mage Kaz poured the best Irish coffee this side of Amber. That's when I first saw her.
She was sitting at the bar, slightly slouched over an untouched drink, an angel meditating on the holy grail. As I slipped onto the stool next to her, I smelled the cheap vodka in the glass and more than a hint of ammonia (whether from the angel or the bar, I couldn't tell, and at that point, I didn't really care.) I noticed that she was picking her teeth with a straightened-out paper clip. She was a looker alright, from her shoulder-length greasy pink hair (with that wild, beckoning stripe of purple over her left ear) to her mud-caked Army boots (artificial dirt on designer-label ankle huggers, I have an eye for exotic footwear.) The smeared theatrical blood that framed her own deep brown cave-like eyes complimented the red fur-lined tank top she wore over her slight torso. Her spindly legs were covered in cream-colored thermal underwear, at least two sizes too big, and artfully ripped at the knees and calves. Over these she wore a red and white checkered tablecloth (Pizza Hut, unless I was mistaken), tied at her waist with a severed length of orange extension cord (the grounded plug hanging tantalizingly over her left knee.) Oh yeah, she was all that and more. Everything I had never realized I was looking for in a woman. The instant she turned toward me and our eyes met, I knew my heart was destined to be broken, even before she opened her mouth and began screaming.
She was sitting at the bar, slightly slouched over an untouched drink, an angel meditating on the holy grail. As I slipped onto the stool next to her, I smelled the cheap vodka in the glass and more than a hint of ammonia (whether from the angel or the bar, I couldn't tell, and at that point, I didn't really care.) I noticed that she was picking her teeth with a straightened-out paper clip. She was a looker alright, from her shoulder-length greasy pink hair (with that wild, beckoning stripe of purple over her left ear) to her mud-caked Army boots (artificial dirt on designer-label ankle huggers, I have an eye for exotic footwear.) The smeared theatrical blood that framed her own deep brown cave-like eyes complimented the red fur-lined tank top she wore over her slight torso. Her spindly legs were covered in cream-colored thermal underwear, at least two sizes too big, and artfully ripped at the knees and calves. Over these she wore a red and white checkered tablecloth (Pizza Hut, unless I was mistaken), tied at her waist with a severed length of orange extension cord (the grounded plug hanging tantalizingly over her left knee.) Oh yeah, she was all that and more. Everything I had never realized I was looking for in a woman. The instant she turned toward me and our eyes met, I knew my heart was destined to be broken, even before she opened her mouth and began screaming.
Monday, December 04, 2006
Snow Day, the Conclusion
Long story made only slightly shorter: power came back Saturday night. Saturday morning the apartment was freezing (slacker did not want to crawl out from under all of his covers...) Put the car off the road in the driveway to my apartment. It took three of us to get it back on the pavement and I dug a nice trench with my passenger side wheels (Winter, Professor Scott Jones was one of the three... fun!)
Despite the ice and the freezing and the off-road adventures, I managed to spend a good weekend with the kids (who slept at their mom's Friday, so they didn't freeze!)
Despite the ice and the freezing and the off-road adventures, I managed to spend a good weekend with the kids (who slept at their mom's Friday, so they didn't freeze!)
Friday, December 01, 2006
Snow Day
Thick ice, lots of snow and wind, and I've been without power since sometime in the middle of the night. Classes were canceled, the offices closed, so of course after a hike to Hardee's for breakfast, I chiseled out my car and drove in to read blogs :-)
Actually, my boss called this morning and said that we'd be working this afternoon (grading papers and getting ready for class next week), so my play time is limited.
Still, I love this weather. I had to use a hammer on my car to break the ice and pry open a door. Driving is treacherous, and if I don't get power soon I'll be less than happy, but right now I'm enjoying being a manic disciple of Jack Frost. Enjoy your weekends!
Actually, my boss called this morning and said that we'd be working this afternoon (grading papers and getting ready for class next week), so my play time is limited.
Still, I love this weather. I had to use a hammer on my car to break the ice and pry open a door. Driving is treacherous, and if I don't get power soon I'll be less than happy, but right now I'm enjoying being a manic disciple of Jack Frost. Enjoy your weekends!
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Mathematicians in Love
Well, Rucker's latest is finally in my sweaty little hands, so all other reading is being dropped until I get through Mathematicians in Love. That means a couple of books on Richard Dawkins, the Collins book (sorry, Lisa, but I haven't read it yet), The Left Hand of God (about liberal religion and politics), and The Greatest White Trash Love Story Ever Told will all have to wait (as well as any undead-related reading that I may, or may not, be starting this holiday season!)
Wishing I Was an Elf
For reason #23 why I wish I was an elf see the current Dungeon Crawl, Inc. comic strip (link in the right column!) Castor's closing line summarizes it well: "Damn elf mojo! How are regular guys suppose to score with you around?"
Apologies to those who are offended by the strip or the language of the quote or even the vaguely sexist implications of it, but really, the point is that chicks dig elves, I mean, "women people" not "chicks," oh, heck, humans dig elves. Is that any better?
Apologies to those who are offended by the strip or the language of the quote or even the vaguely sexist implications of it, but really, the point is that chicks dig elves, I mean, "women people" not "chicks," oh, heck, humans dig elves. Is that any better?
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Chance or the Dance?
[Note: this is a rather lengthy post about evolution, a topic that many of you who read this blog semi-regularly could care less about. It's ok, I don't expect it to be read. This is just a convenient place to store my thoughts as I work through the issue. If you want to chime in, great. If not, that's fine as well.]
Is this world and all its myriad of living creatures the result of random chance or is it all orchestrated by a Choreographer? Science tells us the answer is neither.
Contrary to popular misconception, evolution does not say that we evolved by chance. What it does say is that we evolved by natural selection, which isn't particularly random at all. There is survival of the fittest because the fittest survive. Fittest for what? For surviving in a particular niche in a particular time and place with particular neighbors (predators and prey, as well as vegetation, water, sunlight, etc.) And not just surviving, but reproducing before dying. As Richard Dawkins points out in River Out of Eden, every single living organism today is a direct descendant from a chain of ancestors who all mated at least once before they died. Those who survived long enough to reproduce propagated their genetic material. Those who didn't, well obviously, they didn't.
So, we have a process where some organism are able to reproduce and some aren't. Eventually the traits of the members of a species that contribute to survival/reproduction are dominant in the gene pool, and other traits are not. A change to the environment (migration to find new food, natural disaster, etc.) begins to favor new traits. Over a period of time, a new set of traits become favored. Given enough time, enough changes, speciation occurs: the changes become so pronounced that a group of the same species that migrated to look for food elsewhere can no longer interbreed with the (relatively stable, genetically speaking) descendants of those who remained in the original area.
Randomness does factor in during the infamous "good mutation" story. In this tale, an organism might have a random genetic mutation (don't ask me how, probably cosmic radiation, like the Fantastic Four) that creates a trait that gives it a greater chance for survival/reproduction, thus introducing new genetic material into the gene pool. Note, by our definition this new material will be favored by natural selection.
The problem with this tale is that almost all known mutations are harmful, many are fatal, and several lead to an inability to reproduce. The problem with this problem is that we've only been looking at mutations at a genetic level for less than 100 years! Even if you bought 100 lottery tickets, you still wouldn't have very good odds of winning the Big Jackpot. But if you, J. Random Player wouldn't have good odds of winning, the odds are pretty good that someone will win.
Given that there is a wealth of information in the DNA of any critter, evolution by natural selection says that those critters who have traits that are more conducive to surviving and reproducing will survive and reproduce more than those who don't. But this is all relative to the complexities of the environment, which may be more or less stable, but is also, more or less, always changing as well. At times, dice are tossed into the mix both by large scale environmental changes and mutations (of the latter, most are harmful, likely resulting in the immediate death of the organism, but some very few are X-Men-like).
This is why artificial life became such a big deal in the 1990s. A-life studies computer-generated "life." The archetypical example would be the cellular automata of John Conway's Game of Life. This creates a very simple environment with very simple rules (basically a spreadsheet of square cells with rules about when a cell is shaded in or not), but it results in a large variety of emergent behavior. "Species" of a sort emerge from combinations of shaded cells and rules, as does reproduction and symbiosis. This in no way approaches the complexity of even the simplest biological evolutionary scenario, but it is a sort of "proof of concept" that this kind of theory does play out in some scenarios (the admittedly simplistic digital ecologies of artificial life).
Are there problems with the theory of evolution? Of course. The details are not worked out. By way of comparison we still don't know some very specific things about quantum physics, and even gravity still has some mysteries for us. Mysteries do not mark the end of science, but its beginning. Science is the quest to explain the mysteries of the world around us in terms of natural explanations. Natural selection is a natural explanation. Divine intervention is not.
All of which is good and fine and dandy, but... what if there is a Divine Intervener who is out there? If there is, would we still not be able to put together the best naturalistic theories we can, and continue to refine them to deal with new evidence, and, essentially, be wrong? If there is, for instance, a Creator, then any theory of origins that denies such a creator would be wrong no matter how much explanatory power it had. The Ptolemaic system of astronomy had a certain explanatory power as well. It turned out to be wrong. Could all naturalistic theories of ultimate origins and destiny also turn out to be wrong? If so, how would a system that by design and definition can only see naturalistic explanations ever come to know this?
Perhaps the theistic evolutionists have the best position, affirming as they do aspects of both theistic religion and evolutionary science. But by affirming both, they also deny aspects of both, aspects that both scientists and the faithful are uncomfortable in denying. That is one thing naturalistic evolutionists and creationists often agree on: theistic evolutionists are wrong. Far from being a workable compromise, theistic evolution represents a third position altogether.
Where does this leave us? Well, it leaves me believing the bible and believing modern science (or, more dangerously, it leaves me believing that I believe the bible and believing that I believe modern science. But, and here is the scary part, maybe I don't believe one or the other or maybe neither, maybe I only believe that I believe them. How would one know the difference?) Anyway, none of this is intended as an assault on faith (I still believe in the triune God and salvation through the incarnate Son, at least I believe that I believe that :-), nor does is it a dismissal of the critiques of evolution by intelligent design proponents (I am open to the possibility that evolution could be wrong).
It's only in the last year or so that I've begun to think very seriously about evolution at all. I am not a scientist, but I'd like to understand why so many believe evolution is as true a truth as we know and why others reject it as being either a mistaken theory or a lie straight from the pit. Supposedly it's about the evidence and facts, about what we sometimes call "science," but there's also a lot of talk about theory and the nature of science. Science is rarely just about the facts, but is about explaining those facts (and often this means going to great efforts to collect facts which have never been collected). Is evolutionary biology a proper science? Who gets to decide and how are those decisions made? If it's not, why do so many say it is? If it is, why do so many say it's not?
Is this world and all its myriad of living creatures the result of random chance or is it all orchestrated by a Choreographer? Science tells us the answer is neither.
Contrary to popular misconception, evolution does not say that we evolved by chance. What it does say is that we evolved by natural selection, which isn't particularly random at all. There is survival of the fittest because the fittest survive. Fittest for what? For surviving in a particular niche in a particular time and place with particular neighbors (predators and prey, as well as vegetation, water, sunlight, etc.) And not just surviving, but reproducing before dying. As Richard Dawkins points out in River Out of Eden, every single living organism today is a direct descendant from a chain of ancestors who all mated at least once before they died. Those who survived long enough to reproduce propagated their genetic material. Those who didn't, well obviously, they didn't.
So, we have a process where some organism are able to reproduce and some aren't. Eventually the traits of the members of a species that contribute to survival/reproduction are dominant in the gene pool, and other traits are not. A change to the environment (migration to find new food, natural disaster, etc.) begins to favor new traits. Over a period of time, a new set of traits become favored. Given enough time, enough changes, speciation occurs: the changes become so pronounced that a group of the same species that migrated to look for food elsewhere can no longer interbreed with the (relatively stable, genetically speaking) descendants of those who remained in the original area.
Randomness does factor in during the infamous "good mutation" story. In this tale, an organism might have a random genetic mutation (don't ask me how, probably cosmic radiation, like the Fantastic Four) that creates a trait that gives it a greater chance for survival/reproduction, thus introducing new genetic material into the gene pool. Note, by our definition this new material will be favored by natural selection.
The problem with this tale is that almost all known mutations are harmful, many are fatal, and several lead to an inability to reproduce. The problem with this problem is that we've only been looking at mutations at a genetic level for less than 100 years! Even if you bought 100 lottery tickets, you still wouldn't have very good odds of winning the Big Jackpot. But if you, J. Random Player wouldn't have good odds of winning, the odds are pretty good that someone will win.
Given that there is a wealth of information in the DNA of any critter, evolution by natural selection says that those critters who have traits that are more conducive to surviving and reproducing will survive and reproduce more than those who don't. But this is all relative to the complexities of the environment, which may be more or less stable, but is also, more or less, always changing as well. At times, dice are tossed into the mix both by large scale environmental changes and mutations (of the latter, most are harmful, likely resulting in the immediate death of the organism, but some very few are X-Men-like).
This is why artificial life became such a big deal in the 1990s. A-life studies computer-generated "life." The archetypical example would be the cellular automata of John Conway's Game of Life. This creates a very simple environment with very simple rules (basically a spreadsheet of square cells with rules about when a cell is shaded in or not), but it results in a large variety of emergent behavior. "Species" of a sort emerge from combinations of shaded cells and rules, as does reproduction and symbiosis. This in no way approaches the complexity of even the simplest biological evolutionary scenario, but it is a sort of "proof of concept" that this kind of theory does play out in some scenarios (the admittedly simplistic digital ecologies of artificial life).
Are there problems with the theory of evolution? Of course. The details are not worked out. By way of comparison we still don't know some very specific things about quantum physics, and even gravity still has some mysteries for us. Mysteries do not mark the end of science, but its beginning. Science is the quest to explain the mysteries of the world around us in terms of natural explanations. Natural selection is a natural explanation. Divine intervention is not.
All of which is good and fine and dandy, but... what if there is a Divine Intervener who is out there? If there is, would we still not be able to put together the best naturalistic theories we can, and continue to refine them to deal with new evidence, and, essentially, be wrong? If there is, for instance, a Creator, then any theory of origins that denies such a creator would be wrong no matter how much explanatory power it had. The Ptolemaic system of astronomy had a certain explanatory power as well. It turned out to be wrong. Could all naturalistic theories of ultimate origins and destiny also turn out to be wrong? If so, how would a system that by design and definition can only see naturalistic explanations ever come to know this?
Perhaps the theistic evolutionists have the best position, affirming as they do aspects of both theistic religion and evolutionary science. But by affirming both, they also deny aspects of both, aspects that both scientists and the faithful are uncomfortable in denying. That is one thing naturalistic evolutionists and creationists often agree on: theistic evolutionists are wrong. Far from being a workable compromise, theistic evolution represents a third position altogether.
Where does this leave us? Well, it leaves me believing the bible and believing modern science (or, more dangerously, it leaves me believing that I believe the bible and believing that I believe modern science. But, and here is the scary part, maybe I don't believe one or the other or maybe neither, maybe I only believe that I believe them. How would one know the difference?) Anyway, none of this is intended as an assault on faith (I still believe in the triune God and salvation through the incarnate Son, at least I believe that I believe that :-), nor does is it a dismissal of the critiques of evolution by intelligent design proponents (I am open to the possibility that evolution could be wrong).
It's only in the last year or so that I've begun to think very seriously about evolution at all. I am not a scientist, but I'd like to understand why so many believe evolution is as true a truth as we know and why others reject it as being either a mistaken theory or a lie straight from the pit. Supposedly it's about the evidence and facts, about what we sometimes call "science," but there's also a lot of talk about theory and the nature of science. Science is rarely just about the facts, but is about explaining those facts (and often this means going to great efforts to collect facts which have never been collected). Is evolutionary biology a proper science? Who gets to decide and how are those decisions made? If it's not, why do so many say it is? If it is, why do so many say it's not?
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
No Spin on Video Games?
Ah, Morgan, your man O'Reilly here is takin' his shots close to home now, innit he? 'Course, I ain't sayin' he's all wrong now, not at all, at all. I'm just thinkin' things must be slow down in the old No Spin Zone. Oh well, they say it's a free country, so I guess it's alright then ;-)
Zombies for Scholars
Two new books for those who like to reflect on what the undead have to tell us:
- The Gospel of the Living Dead: George Romero's Visions of Hell on Earth (Baylor University Press)
- The Undead and Philosophy: Chicken Soup for the Soulless (Open Court Books)
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